Where does the time go?

It has been so long since I last posted.  Life has a way of getting away from us.  Next week I start working at the Just Between Friends Sale.  I love helping out friends and benefiting at the same time.  For those who do not know what JBF is well for shame for shame.  JBF is only one of the top consignors sales in the nation.  For the last three years I have made what they call the thousand dollar club.  You take all the duke in your house that your children have accumulated and you sale it for a profit.  You can sell just about any thing.  Clothing, shoes, baby equipment, toys, room decorating things, books, the list goes on and on.  As my children get older we have less and less to sale so I often watch out for the good bargains and try to beat my friend E to the store before they are all gone. 

My family knows that when sale time roles around we all pitch in.  Daddy becomes Mommy for about four days until Nonny and aunt Lesa arrive.  Isn't it funny how it takes an army to do a Mommy's job?  However I really appreciate them helping with my children and the kids love it.

My children like to come and see what all the hub is about.  You can never fully understand the sale unless you help with it.  The thrill of finding the best deals and racing your friends to get them is more fun than words can express.  We work like slaves all day but love it because Daven has a way of making you feel so appreciated and is always so thankful for you helping.  Daven is one of the owners.  I have found Emma many Boutique and name brand clothing items for as little as three dollars.  Now honey I can assure you that you can not buy a baby LuLu anywhere else on the planet for three dollars.  If you don't believe me look it up on line.  Now the blessing to finding those bargains is that I get to shop on the Friday night before the sale starts on Sunday.  Why? you ask because I am what they call a 24 hour employee.  That mean that I donate my 24 hours to shop the best deals in town.  Girls I am here to tell you it is worth every minute.  I shop for three children and I but most of their clothing at JBF and spend only about $300 to $400 on a entire seasons worth of clothing. 

So if you are looking for something for a baby all the way through to a preteen their is something for everyone.  They even have furniture.  Don't take my word for it, come and see for yourself.  Check out the website.  You want to save and make money at the same time this deals for you.  I am in charge of organizing all that duke so I am sure that I will see you there.  Happy Shopping!

Prayer in Parenting

I am so proud of my children and the people they are becoming.  Having PK's  you know Preachers kids comes with a lot of yuk.  I tell everyone it is like living in a giant fish bowl.  Every thing we do, say, wear and the choices we make are judged by all.  People say they don't judge but they do, we all do when we have an opinion.  Some people are just a lot nicer about it.  Having said that I try to teach my kids that as long as what they do is pleasing to God all those other people just don't matter.  I see my children stand up for what is right a lot and it makes me so happy.  You know you do that little ye haw when no one is looking. 

I make mistakes all the time and I don't think it is wrong to say you were wrong.  Parents get off track.  It is OK to share with your children when you say or do somethings that does not model God.  I feel like as a parent it is not our primary goal to raise children who fill up the book shelf with trophies, awards and certificates.  When we model the behavior that sports rule supreme what are we teaching our children?  Even though we say with our words that Gods most important.  What have our children learned?  Every thing in life is a learning experience and molds our child for a future as an adult.  I want my children to choose church on Sunday and Wednesdays because they love to go, and right now they do.  Now that is something that makes me so proud of all of them.

The most important thing I try to teach my sweet babies is to pray.  We don't just pray at night or at meals.  We pray all the time, no matter where we are or what we are doing.  Praying together as a family is so important.  A study was done by a man named Ed Stetzer who works for Christianity Today and he gave some statistics on praying children and their praying families.  Spiritual Children have good grades.  Praying children are connected with a pastor, youth pastor or children's pastor.  Praying children regularly serve in a church.  Praying children know, own and make known their faith.  Spiritual children participate in ministry and service projects as a family.  Praying children make room, make time and make space for others to participate in ministry together.  I find all of those things as character traits and choices I want for my children.  We pray when we see a wreck.  We pray when we hear a fire truck.  We pray when friend and family are sick.  We pray when someone is having a bad day.  We pray when our friends are ugly to us or use ugly words.  We pray for Daddy and his ministry.  We pray for the neighbors dog.  I don't ever question the prayer of a child or change it in any way.  They know exactly what they mean and so does the Lord.  If you have ever noticed a child prays mostly a prayer of Thanksgiving.

Parents we cannot pass on what we do not have or do ourselves.  We cannot outsource our relationship with Christ.  The word of God is not sin management.  We simply cannot lead what we do not live.  If our children are proud of us for what we do they will intern make us proud of them for what they do.

Every night I pray over my children and I ask the Lord to put a shield of protection around them.  I pray that he shield them from any and all evil.  I pray for their health, for their life choices and for their spiritual growth.  I pray for each of my children by name and ask that they have a servants heart full of compassion and love for all human kind.  I pray for the Lords favor on them and thank him for each special miracle of life that he has Allowed me to have.  Lastly I pray that somewhere in this world he is preparing for them a mate that will help them each get to heaven.  I feel like married couples should be helping each other get to heaven.  Lastly I ask that no matter what life holds in store for us that they each will know how much I love them and long to see them in Heaven one day.

Two steps forward and on step back is still progress.  What steps are you  taking?

I love my church friends and family

All my life I have had a few friends that I am really close to. There are also those friends that you spend time with, however its not that quality time.  There are some friends you can trust and others you still are unsure about.  Being in ministry and living in my fish bowl often makes any sort of friend hard to make.  I always worn people that I am not a call me every day, lets vacation together kind of friend.  I will do anything for you whenever you need.  I am just not the friend who brings dinner then stays to visit for  hours.  I am not saying anything is wrong with that I am just explaining who I am. 

I love as an adult having all my friends at church.  At Park Plaza I have made some very good friends and along life's journey I have made many good friends from other churches.  I love that wherever Will and I go we often see people we know.  It is a blessing to us and I hope to them as well.  In Texas we had a group of friends that we did everything with.  Birthdays were the best.  The birthday boy or girl would pick a restaurant and we would all meet for dinner.  Getting together to eat was our favorite past time.  One of the couples worked for Benny Keith and we would get together at their home for "Fried Food Night".  Our children all loved playing together.  We spent Holidays with church friends many times when we could not travel to see our own families.  Will and I were always made to feel a part.  I am so thankful for those times and the memories that we share.  Since we have been in Tulsa our friends here have always been there to help with anything we needed.  When I had Emma the sweet ladies from church and their husbands came to our home and remodeled the guest room into a beautiful nursery.  We get sweet cards in the mail all the time.  The out pouring of love is just wonderful and I am so glad that my children have been able to see what Christian friends do for each other.

When Will and I first married we decided then that we would never look at ministry as job but rather a lifestyle.  We have been so blessed by that choice and we hope to instill that in our children as well.  The good far out weighs the bad.  Don't get me wrong we have been caught in old satins trap more than once but you and learn.  I don't miss the hard times.  I don't miss the mean people we have encountered on this journey.  I will forever miss the people who we have grown to love just like family.  The friends who held us when we cried about our struggle with getting pregnant.  The friends who laughed with us about the silly things.  The friends who mourned with us in loss and the friends who celebrated with us in new life.  Thank God so much for all those blessings.

One thing I know for sure is that without friends to help you out life would be impossible.  I pray that all my children have a friend that they can trust with their secrets, share their dreams with and hold on to in times of need.  I also pray that this friend be a Godly person who makes good life choices and is a great example of Christ and the life he wants us to lead.  I pray all the time that every member of my family has a friend just like Christ and that Jesus will always be their best friend no matter what.  That is why we try to teach about having a relationship with Christ in our classes at church.  I have seen so many teenagers who have grown up knowing all the Bible facts, quoting scripture, and pretending to do what was right just so they would stay out of trouble and never being baptized for the right reason but because that's what they were told to do.  I am certain that when we reach the gates of Heaven the Lord want be asking us about the "meat" of the Bible he will be asking us how did you put what the Bible says to work in your life?  What relationship did you have with me and my son that stands out above the rest?  I want my children to have a friend who shares with them and everyone they meet the incredible love and friendship that Christ will provide.

I am so thankful for all the friends in my life who show Christ love in everything they do and say.  Our time here is short and our days are passing.  Church friends keep you on track, they provide a safe zone but most of all they are family when family is not close by.  Who are your friends?  Are they helping you get to Heaven?  More important are you helping them?

I Always Say It Like It Is

I have this for better choice of words problem with speaking the truth ALWAYS.  I have done it forever, even as a child I said what was on my mind.  Now that I am an adult my buffer seems to work a little better.  I must say though that some people just need to hear it.  For example:  When I take Titus to school in the morning there is always a line to drop off.  Now every school has its parents who believe with all their heart that this school was built for them and that any rules made do not apply unless it bothers them in some way.  So in the drop off line you have the rule followers and the I know it all's.  Some days I wish the front of my car could shoot out idiot bullets to these parents.  It's November people do you really need to set there and watch your child walk all the way to the door?  Or better yet hop out of your car, straighten their clothing, put on their backpack and kiss them?  Now let me just say that I am  very easy going, however when we are sitting in a line of 100 cars or more and you think your child is the only one on the planet, you  better run back to your seat because girl you are about to be mowed over by some serious stay at home moms who are late for the gym. 

Example:  My biggest pet peeve is when people take advantage of those who are too kind to say anything.  You know the type always playing the martyr.  Oh woe is me!!!  They think up  these excuses for everything and in my mind I am thinking are you for real.  Working in the ministry I have met truck loads of these people.  I am sure that it is in every profession.  The best are the excuses for why I cant teach class.  1.  I don't like the curriculum.    Are you for real.  I mean I know every one has an opinion but really.  Save it, pull your Bible out and show the love.  Or think of something better because the curriculum thing is older than the moon.  2.  I am so busy.  You are only busy with what you choose to be busy with.  3. I am with kids all day I just need some time to myself.  Ok I get this to an ex tint, but what is your excuse for the summer quarter.  4.  Why cant the older generation do it.  Because they already did it when you were kid.   5.  I am not a good teacher.  That is how you learn.  So like so many Martyr gone before us we again take advantage of those always willing to give their time to teach Gods word to our children.  On top of that we sat back and critique what they do and complain when we don't agree.  All along not helping, and not offering assistance to those who do.  If your not willing to sign your name the the written complaint in anything in life maybe you should just keep that complaint to yourself. 

I am sure that those things will get me in trouble.  You know it always seems like saying the truth gets you in trouble so people avoid it and smile.  Sometimes I would like to see what they are really thinking.  Please don't be offended by what I have written.  I am just telling you how I think it is.........................

Where you come from tells a lot about you.

I grew up in a really small town in West Texas.  I am the oldest of three children.  I have a sister Mindy who is 37 and a  brother Devin who is 30.  My parents are hard working middle class.  I grew up in a very strict home with a lot of rules.  My mom took us to church every Sunday and we were given the choice to attend but strongly encouraged to do so.  My dad believes that there is a God but does not worship him weekly at church.  My parents worked hard to teach us values and respect for people and things.  Family is a big part of our lives and always will be. 

My mom had me when she was very young.  My birth father did not stick around.  My mom never talked bad about him.  In fact she just never talked about him at all.  My mom married Kenneth when I was three.  Kenneth is the only dad I ever knew.  Once they were married he adopted me and had my name changed to Rushing.  I love my parents.  Like all families we had our dysfunction.  My dad drank a lot when I was growing up and never pushed that on us but we saw what happen.  Sometimes it would make him a mean person.  He has since stopped that completely and I am so proud of him.  Life's circumstances are not always what we would choose them to be.  My parents are very much in love and have always shown the value of marriage and what it means by the example they lived.  Both of my parents come from families of seven siblings.  Yes you read it correctly I had 24 aunts and uncles after everyone was married.  Even better than that most of them lived close to us and some even in the same city so holidays were very large.

My sister and I were not very close growing up.  In fact I don't believe we talked for a few years in High School.  The way I remember it is she was a jerk and always getting me in trouble.  I am sure that would not be her version.  We are like night and day in our personalities.  Mindy is so much like my dads family and I am very much like my mothers.  Now that we are adults we get along much better.  My sister has lived a colorful life and mine has been very plain.  I was the athlete, obedient, college, marriage, children girl.  Mindy is the artsy, party, let's try it, still looking for love girl.  Not that I am judging her for any of that, just saying we are different.

My brother is a pain in the butt.  I was already 10 when Devin was born so I did my share in raising him.  I changed diapers, fed, cleaned and put him to sleep a lot.  I loved helping my mom.  I loved my baby brother.  It took Devin a few marriages and lots of time but he is a great dad and husband to his now wife Kendra.  Yep he married a girl with my name.  I know its creepy but what are you going to do.  Devin has three children.  Brylee is 9, Reece is 7 and Kendall is 6.  So that means with my children my parents have grand kids that are 9, 8 Titus, 7, 6, 5 Levi and 4 Emma. 

I love my family with all my heart.  We have had our disagreements just like any family.  At this stage in our lives we just try and keep up.  We take turns traveling to see one another when we can.  My sister lives in Seattle so that makes it hard.  My brother lives in Fort Worth, my parents still live in Sterling city and of course we live in Tulsa, OK.  We make it work for us.  The Lord has really blessed my life with a lot of love.  Sometimes we question those things and then even the smallest of gestures can change our whole perspective.  I want my children to grow up knowing that family will always be there.  Next to God they may be all you have sometimes.  You can make the whole world mad, but family they always forgive.  Whats the saying "Blood is thicker than Water".  I think the Lord smiles down on us when he sees how forgiving we can be with family.  Even more important I think its the forgetting that really pleases him.  Take time to call your family, take time to pray for your family, take time to spend time with your family and always thank God that you have them.  There is always someone, somewhere who doesn't have any family, take time to invite them into yours.

Moments after the birth

After Emma was born she only used oxygen briefly.  She began to breath room air much sooner than most preemies.  She was so tiny that Will's wedding ring fit around her foot and hung on her ankle.  Will and I began reading to her and touching her as much as they would let us.  Knowing our voices and feeling our touch early on were very important to her and us.  We read Charlot's Webb to her every day.  The nurses and doctors all loved Emma and always commented on what a  beautiful baby she was.  Our doctor was one of the nicest, most attentive doctors I have ever met.  He was always honest and straight forward about all things.  Gods presence was always apparent.  The nurses were also very sweet.  Will and I took turns with the boys at home and then with Emma at the hospital. 

Emma grew perfectly and with no problems.  The doctor was amazed at her progress.  Will and I knew that Emma was covered in prayer all day every day so we began to pray over other babies in the NICU.  It is our belief that in every situation God provides for us the opportunity to minister to others.  We made some dear friends and met many people along this journey. 

One story sticks out in my mind that I would like to share with you.  The second day of Emma's life I was in hospital still and a woman asked the nurses if she could talk with me.  This woman did not give a name, however she had a powerful story to share.  Last year at this exact time she gave birth to a daughter who was premature and very ill.  The baby did not survive and she was very angry still at God for taking her child.  The pain was almost more than she could bare.  Not loving the Lord and knowing his full power and grace made a difference in how she felt as well.  She was not a christian and did not know about salvation.  I was still very drugged when she came to visit me.  The Holy Spirit was present in my conversation with her that night.  She gave me a dress that she had bought for her baby and wanted Emma to have it.  Through the tears I asked her to have a seat and began to minister with all my heart.  My friends will tell you that when I am passionate about something I can let you have it so to speak.  I am also not very good at filtering what I say therefore I just tell it like it is. 

I thanked her for the gift and we prayed together.  I asked that she be healed both physically and spiritually from the pain her life had caused.  I asked that the Lord provide for her the opportunities to seek him and his love in all that she did.  I told her about the loving family at Park Plaza and how gifted that church was in seeking and saving the lost.  People from all walks of life choosing the same narrow path to find Christ.  She left that night and I never knew her name.  I pray for her everyday and for her healing because of my miracle God sent this woman to hear my story and to believe in him again.  God is powerful when we give him the control.  41 days later and our sweet Emma came home.  Perfect in every way.  Thank you Lord for your everlasting love.

If you don't believe in Miracles this will change your mind.

Will and I were very comfortable in our new home in Tulsa.  Titus was now four years old and Levi was almost one.  We had been in our home for almost two full months when I started feeling sick a lot.  I was tired, and every morning I was throwing up.  I had gone to the doctor and was told I had a Hernia that was in bad condition.  We were in the process of getting all the new insurance straightened out so I just took the doctor they suggested for me.  I started gaining a lot of weight about June and my breast were hurting like crazy.   I went back to the doctor and was told I must have some kind of virus.  All the doctors new my medical history and the fact that their was no chance of getting pregnant.  It never crossed any ones mind.  We did all kinds of test trying to figure out what was wrong with me.  Secretly unknown to Will I had been praying that God would bless our life with more children.  I had been praying this same prayer for 12 years now.  Have you ever heard people say all things happen in Gods time not ours?  Well I am here to tell you that is exactly right. 

Fall rolled around and I was wearing big clothing.  I had gained a lot of weight on top of already being a heavy lady.  I was teaching at the Preschool and trying to help Will with our new Ministry.  I was very busy because I also had two small children to take care of.  One Sunday morning while getting the boys ready for church, I fell down the stairs while holding Levi.  Levi was a chubby little guy and was very heavy.  I messed up my back and neck pretty bad so I went to the chiropractor to get fixed.  They did xrays of my spine and neck.  I was adjusted and I remember when I layed on the bed it hurt my stomach.  I suffered that pain to relieve another and moved on.  Early November I had a Bunko night with some friends.  I was not feeling well at all.  My body was swollen a lot.  I had called the doctor to get in but they had no openings unless it was an emergency.  I was going to live so I did not push the matter.  I remember asking God to heal me of whatever this was making me so ill.  I was tired, sick and just needed some rest.  If you know me at all you know that sitting still and not working is not something I can do.  I went to Bunko that night and on the way I stopped at a drugstore to see if they had something for water retention.  The Pharmacist said mam you look Preclamsic.  What in the world does that mean?  He suggested I take a pregnancy test before taking in medication.  I giggled and said that's impossible.  I bought the test just for kicks and went on the Bunko.  When I got there the girls were really worried about me.  I looked like Shreks wife.  My nose had swollen across my face, my skin was so full of fluid it looked like it would burst, I could only wear flip flops because my shoes did not fit and I had these huge white circles under my eyes.  I told them what the pharmacist had said and they made me pee on the stick while I was there.  Everyone was just sure I was pregnant.  Having type II Diabetes sometimes you get false readings on the pee sticks, so I'm told.  The first test did not work at all so the girls told me to save it and look at it in the morning.  All night this elation of joy filled my spirit to just imagine being pregnant.  When you have been through all we have those moments of maybes are all you got.  The next morning I checked the test and it was positive.  Holy Buckets!  I am pregnant!  I grabbed the other test and took it right away it was also positive.  Silence

Lord I have prayed for this all my life it seems.  If I am pregnant please protect this child and let me get the help I need.........

I ran to the bedroom and jumped on Will, honey we may be pregnant for real this time.  WHAT!  We called the doctor and asked if this was Emergency enough and we got in for an appointment in three days.  It was Thanksgiving so we waited through the weekend.  I was so stunned but still not convinced.  If you have ever experienced Infertility and are given that hope only to have it taken away again and again its hard to believe.  To be a woman and long for motherhood, to see others around you joyfully having families and to see people who don't want children having them, it changes who you are and how you think.  The pain your heart feels when you loose a baby, the pain you feel when nothing you do works.  Words just cant express!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanksgiving came and went.  It was November 29th, 2006 when we woke up got the boys ready for Preschool and were off to see the doctor.  The day was normal just like any other except that I had a very bad headache that morning.  This was such a pain like I had never felt and on top of that I was throwing up a lot that morning. We dropped the boys off at school. We got to the doctors office and I went in.  Will waited outside for them to call him back.  We went in the room and they weighed me, took my temp and then my blood pressure, I also took the pregnancy test.  The doctor looked sick and said "Mrs. Spoon are you feeling well?"  In my mind I really wanted to slap this fellow and say do I look like I feel well?  No, I am sick, my head hurts, I cant breathe, my nose looks like it is touching both my earlobes, my eyes have crop circles around them and you want to know if I am feeling well?  I answered no sir and explained I have been very ill and I took a pregnancy test that said yes.  He told me to lay down that they were calling an ambulance to come and get me.  WHAT!  Your blood pressure is dangerous and the test you took shows that you are pregnant.  Holy Crap!  I lost my Christianity for a moment.  I am pregnant?  Yes, but we don't know how far along you are so the ambulance is taking you to the hospital right now.  Your blood pressure is so high you could have a stroke.  I need Will right now he is in the waiting room.  Will came in and the doctor said Mr. Spoon your wife is in critical condition and she is pregnant.  Will nearly hit the floor.  Are you sure he said?  Yes she is going to the hospital right now.  Little did we all know but outside one of Tulsa's biggest Ice Storms ever had just begun.  The ambulance did not come so Will said I will take her.  We ran to the car and the ice was coming down hard.  All the way we both never spoke but prayed and cried as we got in our car and tried to understand what was going on.  It seemed like hours to cross that street to St. Francis Hospital.  Will was on his cell phone and I just sat there stunned and elated all at once.  I AM HAVING A BABY!  Thank you father. Thank you so much. Please keep us safe.

We got to the Emergency room and the doctor had already called.  I walked in got in a wheelchair and the nurse ran with me to the elevator.  Will was parking the car and barely caught us on the way up.  I was undressed, drugged and in a bed in about 7 minutes.  Poor, Will he was trying to get our parents and get someone to take care of the boys.  Its funny but even in our biggest moment of need all we could do was think about taking care of everyone else.  The next doctor came in and examined me.  She said you are 29 weeks pregnant and this baby is going to be born tomorrow if all goes well.  WHAT!  Mrs. Spoon you are very ill and we have to save you and the baby and this is the only way.  You save this baby at any cost I said.  I prayed my whole life for this child and I know God has great plans in store.  Our church family at Park Plaza, in Ft. Worth, in Sterling City, in Missouri, in Oklahoma and many more I did not name interlaced our family with such a powerful ring of prayer I never even worried for a moment.  A complete sense of Peace and Love filled every person, and thing around us.  The doctor pulled Will aside and told him that there may come a time when he will have to choose me or the baby.  Will assured him that this would never happen because our God was now in full control and everything would be as it should.

That was the longest night of my life.  I was in and out of both prayer and sleep.  I just wanted to worship the Lord and thank him for this miracle.  Morning came and it all began so fast.  Getting my spinal shot was tough because I was so swollen that he could not get the niddle to go where he needed it to go.  I was prepared for the C section and lay there wandering if I was having a boy or a girl.  I did not really care which I could hardly wait to meet this new little life.  Will sat by me the whole time, nervously wanting to fix or do mostly I think he just wanted to bake something to make him self feel better.  There was no pain but a lot of pressure.  Then the moment I had waited for all my life.  Sweet baby girl was pulled out and they showed her to me.  I was so thrilled.  They rushed her off and I begged Will to go and be with her so she would not be alone.  He went reluctantly because he was worried about me.  She was here, I was here and life was so grand.  Seeing your child for the first time is not something words can explain.  I felt the same way when I saw Titus and Levi and now my sweet Emma.   3 lbs. 2 oz and 21 weeks old.  How can you not believe in a miracle.